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The Straightest Girl I know - a season eight ficlet

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  • The Straightest Girl I know - a season eight ficlet

    Some Unknown Future Point When Faith Is Back in the Fold.

    Rating: R

    Faith looked up as the bottle of tequila landed on the table, followed by two glasses. Willow stood next to her, a half smile on her face. She cocked her head, and Faith nodded. Willow sat.

    Faith opened the bottle and poured two glasses. She passed one to Willow, who raised it in salute, downed it, and slammed the glass back down on the table.

    Faith whistled as she refilled the glass.

    “Things sure have changed around here,” she said, shaking her head.

    “Hello! Tried to destroy the world, here. I can’t do a shot of tequila?” She finished off her second glass. “Or two.”

    Faith chuckled and refilled both their glasses.

    “I don’t know. It is different. You flyin’ around, Xander playin’ at soldier boy, this place–” she gestured to the stone walls around them. “ – Dawn! Toto, we sure as **** ain’t in Kansas anymore.”

    She downed her second glass of tequila. “I mean, when I was out with the G-man, it was like – that was weird enough, you know? ‘Cause…I ain’t Buffy. And I ain’t never gonna be Buffy. But then it turned out he wasn’t actually looking for a Buffy, so…” she shrugged, and poured herself another drink. “But this – this is weird.”

    “You don’t even know.”

    Faith looked up, halfway through her third glass. “What?”

    Willow leaned in, looking a little giddy for Faith’s taste. “You think living in a castle is weird? Wait til you hear what Buffy did while you were out with Giles.”

    Faith looked at her, eyebrows raised. “What’d she do? Aside from, you know, trying to kill me in England. Our perfect little slayer got her hands dirty?” She leaned back in her chair, smiling slightly. “Is it big?”

    Willow smiled. “It’s bigger than Giant Dawn. Well, metaphorically speaking. Physically, it’s much smaller, obviously, because Dawn’s like the size of the castle, so it couldn’t really be bigger than Dawn…unless it was the castle, in which case I guess physically it would actually be bigger than Dawn…”

    “Red. The story. Tell it.” She clinked glasses with Willow and finished off her fourth drink.

    Willow did the same. “Right. Well, remember that slayer Satsu? Cute Asian girl? Good with the fighting?”

    Faith screwed up her face. “I think you’re gonna have to be a bit more specific here, Red.”

    Willow paused. “Um…showed up right when we all got to Cleveland, before I took off with Kennedy.”

    “Oh, right. Cute girl. Wore a lotta lipgloss. Gotcha.” She poured another drink. “And how is the ol’ Ken these days anyway? Still got that whole tongue piercing thing goin’ for her?”

    Willow shifted in her seat. “Oh, you know. On again, not so on again…”

    “What’re you now?”

    “We had a slight disagreement when I left the last time…”

    “Well I dunno how she does it…I don’t think I could sleep with someone who I couldn’t beat the crap outta, if I had to.”

    Willow gave her an odd look, but forged ahead.

    “Anyway, story. So. Satsu. She had this big crush on Buffy…”

    “So Satsu plays for your team, does she? Wouldn’ta thought…she has nice hair…”

    “And long story short – ” Willow glared, daring Faith to interrupt again “ – she slept with her.”

    Faith spit a mouthful of tequila across the table.

    “What!?! B???

    Willow nodded, trying not to smile too widely.

    “Buffy. Slept. With. A. Girl?”

    Willow nodded again.

    Faith grabbed the bottle. “Wow. I need another drink!” She picked up her glass and raised the bottle to pour. “On second thought –” She took a long swig directly from the bottle and then passed it to Willow.

    “I know, right? You should have seen –”
    “Whoa. Seen? There was seen?”

    Willow blushed a bit, and took a sip of tequila. “Yeah, well…we kind of accidentally interrupted their afterparty thing…”

    “You and Ken? Man, Red, I didn’t think you had that kinda thing in you! First tryin’ to destroy the world, now orgies…”

    “What! Orgies? There were no orgies! It was a perfectly innocent coitus interruptus. And Kennedy wasn’t there, it was me and Xander and…”

    “So the Xan-man finally got his threeway, huh? Or maybe it was what, a four way?” At Willow’s glare, she chuckled. “Right, right. Innocent, platonic, accidental interruption. What’d you do, fly into her room?”

    Willow nodded and took another drink. The world was all wobbly, and tequila seemed just the thing to make it better.

    Faith laughed, and shook her head. “Of course you did. But seriously, Red – you weren’t the least bit jealous?”

    “Jealous? What?”

    “Oh come on!” Faith dragged her chair closer to Willow’s and nudged her with her shoulder. “Best friends for like ten years, and you never even wondered? Never gave it a thought?”

    Willow blushed bright red. “Well…”

    Faith laughed again, and put her arm around Willow’s shoulders. “There, there…” she said mockingly.

    “Well…what about you?!” Willow said, turning to face her. She immediately regretted turning her head so fast as the world continued to spin around her.

    “Me?? What about me?”

    “Back in high school, well, when we were in high school and you were just hanging around trying to get Buffy to go clubbing all night with you and cut class and fight and…”

    “What?! I never –”

    “Oh, yeah right! You were totally jealous back then!”

    “Well maybe I was a little jealous, but…”

    “Ah HAH!! I knew it! I could totally tell! Well, ok, I couldn’t really, and I didn’t even know I liked girls back then so it’s no wonder I didn’t realize, but still, looking back, I could TOTALLY –”

    “Whoa, I said I was jealous, not, like…romantically jealous! Come on…”

    Willow just looked at her. Faith took another drink, avoiding Willow’s eyes.

    “Well, maybe a little bit…”


    Willow leaned in to rest her head on Faith’s arms, now that she’d gotten the answer she wanted. Her head was too heavy to hold up on its own.

    “Not that, you know, I’m…”

    “Oh, no, totally straight. Absolutely. When I think of straight, I see a picture of you in the dictionary…” Willow trailed off, her fingers finding their way into Faith’s hair.

    Faith gave a low laugh. “I think you got that joke a bit confused…” she said. She moved to disentangle Willow’s fingers, but instead found her own stroking the other girl’s face. Huh.

    “You’re the straightest person I know. Just ‘cause you want to sleep with Buffy. Everyone wants to sleep with Buffy.”

    “No ****ing truer word.” Faith whispered. And then she leaned down and brought her lips to Willow’s. Willow’s tongue licked out against hers. Suddenly, Willow seemed very awake. Faith smiled.

    “So where do you go for a good orgy in this place?”
    Last edited by litzie; 15-06-08, 08:10 PM.