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Saint Angel: a season 5 AtS ficlet

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  • Saint Angel: a season 5 AtS ficlet

    On top of Angel's pile of mail was a glossy-looking envelope. He reached for it and noted that the seal belonged to the Vatican. He pursed his lips, grimly, as he opened the letter. The Vatican's in bed with Wolfram and Hart. There's a surprise.

    But when he read the letter, he did a double-take. Surely not?

    "Wesley!" he called. "Fred! Gunn! Come and look. I'm?" he got up in a fluster. "I've been canonised!"

    Fred and Wesley entered, followed closely by Spike.

    "I've just been canonised, for," Angel peered again at the letter, "A selfless commitment to the eternal battle against evil!"

    "Bollocks!" said Spike.

    "I have! It says here!" countered Angel.

    "Well, I suppose?you have been dead for hundreds of years, technically," said Wesley. "So you would be eligible?in a very confusing sort of a way."

    "Don't they know you're a vampire?" said Fred. "I mean, I would've thought the Pope would be?against that sorta thing."

    "I don't know! I guess they just look at the deeds," he said. Angel's eyes were wide with excited confusion. He might not have been a good Catholic boy for a couple of hundred years, and he might not be able to press flesh to cross without smelling like bacon, but he still couldn't help holding on to his childhood notion that the Pope was basically Santa Claus with a pointier hat and a twirly stick.

    Gunn strode in. "Sorry, heard you wanted me? I got tied up. And, with the G'shandar demon negotiating tactics, I mean that literally." He came over and Angel thrust the letter into his hand. He glanced at it. "Yeah, that's a fake."


    At which point Spike exploded with laughter. Angel glowered at him.

    "Hehehe?the look?hehe?on?.hehe?your?face," he managed to get out. Trying to stifle his laughter, he straightened up and grinned unpleasantly. "Words April and Fool mean anything to you?"

    "Go to hell!" snarled Angel, and shooed them all out of his office. He made a mental note to investigate whether the Vatican were working with Wolfram and Hart. Not that this little incident was their fault but?he thought it might make him feel better, missing out on a Sainthood, if it turned out the people doling ?em out were in the pay of ultimate evil.

    Ultimate evil that was being changed from the inside by the forces of good, obviously.

    -- Robofrakkinawesome BANNER BY FRANCY --