[KingofCretins]

Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Season Eight, Issue 6
“No Future For You, Part I”

Prologue Summary: The Slayer population of the world has gone from two to nearly two thousand. Almost five hundred are working with Buffy’s European-based organization in squads – or “terrorist cells,” according to various military forces. Enter Faith, the pioneer of Slayer-related dirty work, whose talents as a fierce fighter continue to garner the attention of her former Sunnydale compatriots.

Start of Issue #6

The opening image if of a statue face, in close up, on the top of a building. It’s cheeks are cracked and its eyes are closed.

(NARRATION) FAITH: “Oh, the places you’ll go!” Mom used to read me that book before she tucked me in… nights she was sober enough, anyway.

A wider view on the next page shows the top of the building as part of the Cleveland skyline. A young woman is sitting near the top of the building, reclining with an arm across her knee on a perch just below the statue’s face. She is wearing either a leather or dark denim jacket and dark pants.

Cigarette smoke is wafting into the air. Even at a distance, there is no doubt it’s Faith.

(NARRATION) FAITH: But Dr. Seuss never tells you that even with brains in your head and feet in your shoes… you can still end up in Cleveland.

In a close-up, Faith blows smoke out her nose, her lips pursed and her eyes half closed. In the background, a noise is sounding a *DEET DA DEET*, but she ignores it.

(NARRATION) FAITH: “Alone will be something you’ll be quite a lot.” Least the Doc was right about that.

In the next image, we see the sound is coming from Faith’s cellphone, the screen of which says “Robin Wood – Mobile”. It continues ringing a *DEET DA DEET* tone.

We see Faith, standing up on her perch as she answers the phone. Her right hand is on her hip, cigarette between her fingers, as she greets the former principal.

FAITH: I’m impressed, Mister Principal. Most exes are too proud to make the late-night booty call, but not you, huh?

WOOD: (through phone) Hello, Faith.

We see Wood’s end of the conversation, where he is standing inside what looks like a rundown house. He is dressed in a black turtle-neck, as if part of some kind of tactical gear. Behind him, three Slayers are in a fight with five vampires. Four vampires, rather, as one of the Slayers has pinned one to the floor and stakes it with a *PAFT*.

WOOD: Afraid this is business, not pleasure.

The image moves back to Faith, whose expression appears to be mixed with boredom and distaste. She casually flicks away her cigarette, as she responds to Wood.

FAITH: Ah, gotcha. You and your noob squad need a hand from big sister.

WOOD: (through phone) Actually, we have this nest under control. But one of the vamps we captured, before she got turned… she used to be a single mom.

Wood is shown in close-up on his profile, his expression sad.

WOOD: She had children, Faith.

Faith is shown with her face looking similarly sad as she thinks of the implications of what Wood is saying.

WOOD: (through phone) I swear, I never would have bothered you if I thought any of these girls could take care of them, but –

FAITH: Just text me the address, would you?

WOOD: (through phone) Thank you. Sincerely. And, um, how’ve you been? Are you still –

Before he can continue, we see Faith snapping the phone shut. She has pulled a grappling hook out of her waist band and fires it with a *SPANG* as she starts to get moving.

FAITH: So long, Robin.

The grapping hook is shown lodging into the wall of another building.

(NARRATION) FAITH: “You’re off to great places…”

And we see Faith, soaring through the Cleveland night sky on a zipline by her left hand, with a crossbow in her right. Her expression is determined.

(NARRATION) FAITH: “… today is your day!”

When the image changes, we’re seeing an old house from the outside, a spent cigarette butt on the street in close-up. Faith is visible in silhouette on the porch.

Next we see Faith standing in the door, stepping into the house tentatively.

FAITH: Yo. Anybody home?

VOICE: Ehhn.

The view reverses, and we see a little girl huddled in a corner of the room where Faith can see her. She is blond and has bows in her hair.

GIRL: Eehhhhhhn.

The next image if of Faith approaching the girl cautiously, her hands out to be unthreatening.

FAITH: Shhh, everything’s gonna be cool, kid. Can you tell me where your brothers and sisters are? Are they—

In close-up, we see the girl’s eyes. They are yellow, her brow is warped – this is what Wood was afraid of. She is a vampire, and growls at Faith with a *HSSSSSS!*

Faith is shown pulling a stake from her coat regretfully.

FAITH: Damn.

In a wider view, suddenly there are at least five other children… all vampires. Faith draws back in surprise.

FAITH: Dammit.

And we see a picture on a dresser in another room… pictures of the family that these kids belonged to. Shadows from another room show Faith working through the room with her stake with a *PAFT*.

The image moves out, and we see the same pictures through a window from outside. Another *PAFT* settles another one of child vamps inside the house.

And next we see the house from almost the same distance from which it was first seen. *PAFT*, *PAFT*, *PAFT*, and Faith’s work inside is finished.

In a new image, dawn is breaking over Cleveland. We see a building, presumably where Faith’s apartment is.

Inside, the Slayer herself is opening the door to her apartment. Her stake hangs loosely in her hand and her jacket is draped over her other forearm. Her head is hanging despondently. The apartment itself appears to be in disrepair. The walls are cracked, and laundry hangs over the radiator.

With a *SHUNK*, Faith angrily jabs her stake into the wall – the kind of helpless physical outrage we’ve seen from her before.

A voice from behind her gets her attention, and we see her angry brown eyes in close up as she turns to look.

VOICE: Long night?

The voice is coming from Giles, who we see on the reverse view leaning casually against the counter of Faith’s dirty kitchen. He is wearing dark slacks and a sweatshirt with a yellow submarine on it, and is drinking a cup of tea he’s brewed for himself.

GILES: I must say, for cupboards this bare, you have an exceptional selection of chamomiles.

In close-up, Faith’s face has relaxed, but her expression is still dubious as she answers Giles’ remark.

FAITH: What, those smelly bags? Use ‘em on the dark circles under my eyes.

In a wider view, Giles is wiping his lips with a napkin, and Faith has sat down at her breakfast bar to face him where he stands.

GILES: Yes, well…

FAITH: What brings you to my neck, Giles? Haven’t clocked you since the Sunny D went from being an outie to an innie.

As they speak, Giles looks sideways at Faith, who is averting her glance. As she speaks, she’s clearly feeling defensive about her ties to Giles or anyone else.

GILES: I have no idea what that means, but it’s good to see you, Faith.

FAITH: You can skip the friendly uncle routine. I ain’t your beloved Buffy, I’m the go-to girl for dirty deeds done dirt cheap, right? So what do you need me to kill?

Before answering her, Giles has stepped past Faith. We see him in close-up as he takes off his glasses. He’s not facing Faith as he speaks, who watches him from her seat at the breakfast bar.

GILES: I’m afraid this isn’t an ordinary mission.

FAITH: Which makes it different how exactly?

GILES: The stakes are higher, as are the rewards. My sources tell me that you’ve twice attempted to purchase a forged passport.

We see Faith has turned around and sat on top of her counter, scratching her hair with what might be embarrassment. Giles cleans his glasses as they converse, but still doesn’t look her in the eye.

FAITH: So, I was looking to do a little globetrotting. That a crime?

GILES: Yes, actually. But I suspect the truth of the matter is that you want out of this second-rate hellmouth. Out of this *life*. If you accept my assignment, I can offer you safe passage to the nation of your choosing. You’ll be given a generous annual stipend and be permitted to live out the rest of your days however you see fit.

In close-up, we see Faith’s reaction is amazed but mostly disbelieving by her expression.

FAITH: Yeah, right. I’m an escaped con. A murderer. Why would the same Watchers Council that tried to ice me suddenly make with the pension plan?

From over Faith’s shoulder, we see Giles looking out her window. He puts his glasses back on as he answers her.

GILES: For all intents and purposes, I am the Watchers Council. And I’m personally authorizing your “early retirement,” just as I’m authorizing this directive.

FAITH: Must be one hell of a target. What are we talking here, a Nisanti demon? A Buski golem?

In close-up, we see Giles finally look back over his shoulder at Faith. His eyes are full of the significance of what he’s going to ask.

GILES: A Slayer.

In the next image, Giles head is down and his hands are in his pockets. Faith has pulled her legs up and is sitting up on her counter as she processes what he’s said.

FAITH: Wait, *huh*?

GILES: In my generation, there was a single girl given the strength and skill to fight the spread of darkness. In your generation, there are nearly *two thousand* women with the powers of the Slayer, and not all of them have chosen to use their newfound abilities conscientiously.

In close up, Faith’s face hardens. She may think that she’s an example to Giles.

FAITH: You don’t say.

We see Giles in close-up as he turns to face her.

GILES: If the girl in question were merely guilty of the same mistakes you once made – considerable though they may have been – I would opt for rehabilitation. But according to every augur in my employ, including the Great Bearded Wizard of Northampton, unless this young lady is terminated before fall’s end, she will usher in –

In a wider view, Faith jumps off the counter to her feet as she interrupts Giles, still standing in front of her window.

FAITH: – the end of the world, right? You’ve got apocalypse written all over your face.

GILES: This isn’t a game, Faith. I’m not talking about staking the undead, I’m asking you to end the life of a human being.

In close-up, Faith stares levelly as she answers.

FAITH: Heard you the first time. So, who is this evil bitch, anyway?

From Faith’s question, the entire scene changes to show us an image of a beautiful, smiling young woman with short, dark hair and blue eyes.

YOUNG GIRL: I think I should like a puppy.

In a wider view, the same girl is seated on a large white horse. She has a very proper, aristocratic riding outfit on, complete with scarf blowing gracefully in the breeze. Behind her, a man in a red coat is mounted on a black horse. He has red hair, and is holding a black folder or book in his hand. In the background, we see they are riding on a large estate.

YOUNG GIRL: But a proper hound, not one of those rubbish little rats the other girls are stuffing into their Louis Vaittons.

MAN: Might we concentrate on the matter at hand, Lady Genevieve?? Your… *unique* station in life demands a rigorous education, and the foxhunt is the most important chapter of those studies.

In a close-up, Lady Genevieve looks down, sullen and pouting.

GENEVIEVE: I hardly slept a wink last night what with those godforsaken nightmares, so kindly piss off, Roden. Unless you want me to tell his grace the Duke what you’re *really* tutoring his daughter to…

The Lady loses his train of thought, and she looks up, turning her head as if she’s detected something.

GENEVIEVE: Hold a moment. I can feel it.

In the next image, Lady Genevieve leaps from her mount, with Roden behind her watching with approval.

GENEVIEVE: She’s close, isn’t she? She’s hiding right over there!

RODEN: Excellent. Now finish it before she goes to ground.

From a ground’s eye view, we see past the Lady’s riding boot to where a young girl is hiding behind a tree. She appears to be wearing a green school uniform, but it is dirty and torn.

“FOX” GIRL: What *is* this? What the hell do you *want*?

We see the Lady approach the girl. She raises her hand to her mouth, thoughtfully. In the foreground, the hidden girl she’s found looks terrified.

GENEVIEVE: Hnf. This is about as far from “fox” as one can get.

“FOX” GIRL: Look, I don’t know how many other people you nutters have kidnapped, but this time…

Suddenly, the terror turns to a vicious snarl as the girl kicks out and strikes

Lady Genevieve in the gut with a *WHUMP!* Genevieve doubles over in pain at the attack.

“FOX” GIRL: … you snatched the wrong girl!

GENEVIEVE: *Uhnf*!

In a close-up, we see that the attack hasn’t nearly harmed Genevieve, just stunned and angered her. She stares with an angry curl on her lips and mud stain on her blouse where she has been kicked.

GENEVIEVE: You filthy little commoner.

With a *KRAK!*, Genevieve backhands the girl clean off her feet. We can see blood spatter from her face where she has been struck.

GENEVIEVE: I loved that shirt.

In silhouette, we see the two girls alone on the landscape. Genevieve staring down at her victim, and the other girl, landing awkwardly, head-first, with a *WHUMP*.

In the next image, we see that the girl is dead. Her neck has been broken by Genevieve’s backhand, and her face is contorted in pain as her head lays turned awkwardly to the side. Genevieve covers her mouth with both hands as she stares down in surprise. Whether she actually regrets killing the girl is unclear, but she definitely didn’t expect to do so with one punch. Roden steps off his horse behind her.

GENEVIEVE: Oh, god. I… I thought you said this one would be as strong as me. I thought she was another Slayer!

RODEN: And she was, Gigi. Which makes this a most impressive blooding.

In close-up, Genevieve still looks panicked, her hand still over her mouth. Behind her, Roden smirks with an arched eyebrow, gesturing with his right hand behind him and summoning a swirling blue magical energy.

GENEVIEVE: We… we have to hide her body. I’ll have Daddy call his solicitors in case anyone –

RODEN: Don’t worry your precious head.

The next image shows Genevieve, still standing over the girl’s body, her hand on her cheek now. Roden, next to her, is still casting some sort of spell.

The two horses behind them are staring into the air, where two large winged demon-shapes have appeared, made of what appears to be storm-clouds or porous dark stone.

RODEN: The boys will clean up after you.

Next, we see the “boys” are doing just that; the two monsters are picking up the dead Slayer’s body as Genevieve whirls around to confront Roden as we look over his shoulder.

GENEVIEVE: Listen to me, you sad Irish witch. I’ve jumped through every nasty hoop you’ve put in my way, and now I want what was promised me. I want what’s *mine*.

RODEN: First of all, witches are new-eating old hags. I, on the other hand, and a passably attractive warlock. Secondly, you’re just going to have to be patient. As a wise man once said, you can’t have any pudding…

In a new, tight close-up, we see the book Roden has been holding. It’s black cover has a red image that’s familiar and unpleasant – the crescent sunset and rising star that symbolizes Twilight.

RODEN: … if you don’t eat your meat.

In a new scene, we see an establishing panel outside a building. The American flag on the side indicates that the scene is still in the U.S.

Inside the building, we next see a large ballroom or banquet room, set for a large event with fully set tables. Giles and Faith are inside, standing next to one of the tables.

FAITH: I thought this stuck-up debutard lived in Jolly Olde. Why are we still chilling at the mistake by the lake?

GILES: We’ll leave for England when your training is complete.
We see Faith, arms crossed on her chest, turn her head to look up at Giles with a little amusement. He has turned his head to stare back over at her, but both of them are still turned toward the table in front of them.

FAITH: No offense, Professor Turtleneck, but I kinda doubt there’s much you can teach me about the wonderful world of wetworks.

GILES: Faith, were this a garden-variety assassination, I would have used a rifle and done the deed myself. But my intelligence suggests that along with being one of the wealthiest, and thus most-protected, heiresses in the British Isles, Lady Genevieve Savidge has somehow found a way to mystically defend her estate from conventional attack.

Giles continues to speak, and Faith turns to face him, raising a hand against what she thinks he’s suggesting. She is smiling, though.

GILES: The only chance you have finishing this Slayer is by getting close to her through subterfuge and cunning.

FAITH: Hey, I likes me some kink, but if you think I’m going downtown on this chick, you chose the wrong chosen one.

From overhead, we see Giles gesturing toward the table as he continues, ignoring Faith’s misunderstanding of the word ‘cunning’. Faith has crossed her arms again to listen.

GILES: This is about infiltrating her world. I’m going to help you fit into high society in time for you to attend the fancy dress party that Lady Genevieve is throwing for her nineteenth birthday.

FAITH: They seriously call their fancy dress parties “fancy dress parties”? You limeys are even uptight when you get down.

We see Faith throw as dismissive hand over her shoulder as she begins to walk away past Giles, who turns as she goes by him.

FAITH: But whatev, I think I’ve banged enough bankers to know how to fit in with higher tax brackets.

GILES: I assure you, the British class system is about much more than wealth. You’re going to have to become intimately familiar with peerage, diction, etiquette, classical –

FAITH: Dude, how high *are* you? There must be a *billion* girls better suited than me for this My Fair Lady crap.

As Giles tries to keep Faith from leaving he reached out and takes her by her left arm to stop her. Faith freezes with a look of genuine shock and even fear at the sudden contact.

GILES: Better suited than *I*. And yes, there are. But the reason I came to you is because –

The image changes to one shadowed in blue. Faith is in the exact some posture as when Giles took her arm, but it’s a memory of hers we’re seeing. A short, cruel looking man or boy is gripping her arm, and instead of hearing Giles, Faith hears the words that must have been spoken at the time.

BOY: – you’re a worthless *whore*.

When the memory fades, we see Faith whirl on Giles. She has taken a fork from the table and stabs him in the bicep of his left arm with it. The surprise and pain on his face is as intense as the anger and indignation of Faith’s.

FAITH: DON’T *TOUCH* ME!

GILES: GAHH!

In a wider view, we see Faith look abashed and ashamed, covering her mouth with her hand but still holding the fork in the other. Giles is grimacing in pain as he grips his wound with his other hand.

FAITH: Oh. Oh, man. Are you…?

GILES: I’ve – nnn – survived worse.

We see a close-up on Faith, looking down in shame. Behind her, Giles removes his suit jacket. When Faith speaks, she is quiet, apparently almost whispering.

FAITH: Sorry, I… I don’t like getting pawed at. Not unless I paw first.

GILES: Duly noted.

The view reverses, and we see Giles arm revealed as he rolls up his sleeve. Blood is trickling down his left arm. Faith looks over to him, her hand going back up to her hair again, somewhat embarrassed.

FAITH: How bad did I get you?

GILES: It’s fine. You hardly broke the –

FAITH: Hey.

A tight close-up on Giles’ arm shows what Faith has seen, for the first time: the Mark of Eyghon, still tattooed on Giles arm.

FAITH: When did *you* get ink?

The next image shows Giles turning his head away in exasperation, holding his arm.

GILES: Faith, do you honestly think you’re the first young person to have stumbled upon the notion of rebellion?

A close up on Faith shows her eyes closed, head down, dark hair framing her face as Giles continues.

GILES: Do you think you’re the first who ever let an innocent person get hurt because of your own stupidity?

Faith is still hanging her head as we see Giles step up to her side. He is looking down at her paternally as he rolls his sleeve back down to cover his wound.

GILES: You and I aren’t so unalike. But those of us who refused to pay the piper during our adolescence have a responsibility to shoulder the most unpleasant costs of adulthood.

In a tight close-up, Faith’s eyes open, but she doesn’t raise her head. When she speaks, she is quiet again.

FAITH: It was a salad fork, right?

From over head, we see the two of them where they began, standing next to the banquet table, although they have changed sides. Faith is pointing to the place setting from which she grabbed the fork to stab Giles.

GILES: I beg your pardon?

FAITH: The thing I stabbed you with? It was the salad fork, wasn’t it?

GILES: Er, no, actually, the salad fork has a shorter handle and a wider tine base.

We see that Giles is smiling now, pleased with Faith accepting his lessons.

GILES: But that’s as good a place to start as any.

A new scene places us outside the castle in Scotland. From inside, a voice calls out. The voice belongs to Xander.

XANDER: Fear my awesome power!

Inside the castle, we see Xander in a training room standing in front of a heavy bag. He is dressed in sweat pants and shirtless. He’s wearing padded gloves on his hands and looks like he’s about to practice boxing.

XANDER: For lo, like Kurt Russell before me, I am a formidable eyepatch-clad opponent. And lest you think I refer to Captain Ron, let me assured you that the one-eyed character of which I speak is none other than the mighty Snake Plissken, who taught me the very ass-handing I’m about to deliver unto you.

BUFFY: (entering the room) Careful, Xander…

We see the close-up of Buffy as she enters. Her hair is in two braids and she’s smiling slyly as she sees Xander.

BUFFY: … you’re going to taunt that poor bag right off its chain.

XANDER: BUFFY!

The next image shows Xander ducking behind the cover of the heavy bag, peaking out shyly. His voice fades out as he realized how he has been found.

XANDER: Sorry, heh, thought I had the ol’ danger room booked for the whole late-night slot. So I could be alone with my, you know… sweaty… shirtless… shame.

From overhead, we see Buffy turning away from Xander and moving toward a sofa in the training room. She is wearing a white camisole and pink pajama pants.

BUFFY: What inspired this sudden training montage?

XANDER: Oh, Renee asked if we could be sparring partners tomorrow, so I figured I should reacquaint my body with non-Dance Dance Revolution-related movement first.

In a close up, Buffy repeats Xander’s phrase back to him. Her face suggests she’s baiting him, halfway between a smiling and puzzled.

BUFFY: “Sparring partners”?

We see Xander react, raising an indignant finger and his good eye wide.

XANDER: Don’t you arch your eyebrow at me, young lady. Renee and I are just pals. Our workout sessions will be as non-physical as pugilistic-related activities can possibly…

In a wider view, we see Xander fade off as he sees Buffy sitting facing toward a window. She is running her finger idly through the condensation on the glass and she looks distracted.

XANDER: Buff? You okay?

In the next image, we see that Buffy has drawn the Twilight symbol in the window and is staring at it with concern, resting her hand above her forehead.

BUFFY: Sorry, I’m in full-on fret mode about this whole “Twilight” gimmick. We still don’t know what this thing has to do with uncle Sam declaring shock and awe on us, right? You heard anything more from our friend in the library?
Behind her, Xander is pulling his shirt back on. It’s a Sunnydale Swim Team t-shirt.

XANDER: That’s a nugatory. Giles has been incommunicado for a few weeks now. But I’m sure he’s got too many *new books* that need shelving to worry about a classic that’s already been checked out, you know?
From a wide view, we see Xander standing next to Buffy, looking down at her. She is slouching on the sofa, staring at the floor.

XANDER: Um, not that anyone is checking you out, of course. Not anyone here, I mean. In this gym. Right now. Also, has anyone seen where I left my bad analogy?

BUFFY: Made more sense than the dream I just bolted out of.

XANDER: Trouble in slumberland?

We see Buffy’s face as she stares up at him. She looks weary, maybe a little afraid.

BUFFY: I’ve been having repeat’s of the same bad episode every night this week. There’s this… *thing* chasing me, and no matter how hard I run, it always ends up scoring the pounce. But right before it swallows me whole, the big smelly looks me right in the eyes and says, “the Queen is dead.”
The next image shows the creature Buffy has been dreaming of. It has an almost feline body, but a forked snakes tongue, and wings like an eagle. It’s mane is made of green energy, some kind of fire. It is similar to a chimera, but much bigger.

CREATURE: Long live the Queen.

In a new scene, we see a building, apparently in England. It could be Giles home. Curiously, a man in a vest and suite with a subtle smirk and a young blond haired woman in a pink jacket are stepping away from a red phone booth. From inside the building, Giles is asking a question.

GILES: One last question before your car arrives.

Inside the building, we see Giles in a library or living room, probably his own residence.

GILES: According to Debrett’s correct form, who takes seating precedence at a formal dinner – a dowager, peeress or the wife of an incumbent baronet?

FAITH: (from upstairs) I have no sodding idea!

In a close up, we see Giles glancing over his shoulder in the direction of the loft upstairs.

GILES: Marvelous. I dare say your accent is nearly passable.

FAITH: (still upstairs) Good, because I still suck at everything else you taught me.

We see Giles is still looking at one of his books as he responds.

GILES: You’ll be fine, Faith. Does your selection work all right?

FAITH: (from upstairs) If the goal is to make me feel like a complete idiot, then yes.

When the view changes, we see Faith standing on the steps coming down from upstairs. She is wearing a formal gown, a dark green, off the shoulder dress with a wide flowing skirt. She also wears long matching gloves and a jeweled choker. Her hair is done up more carefully than we’ve ever seen it. It’s probably the most beautiful Faith has ever looked in her life, whether she feels it or not.

FAITH: So. How we doing here?

We see Giles staring at her over his shoulder, speechless. He appears to be amazed by Faith’s transformation.

Lowering his glasses, Giles finally answers in a language Faith can understand perfectly.

GILES: Five by five.

The image fades to black, with the message “to be continued”.

End of Issue #6